The 2nd Beta Results

Was it only a few days? It’s felt like a whole month. My world feels turned upside down.

close up of cat

Photo by Pixabay on

Everyone saw through my vague hints on social media. I guess subtlety is not my strength.

It’s still early. I am hoping for the best, but trying to prepare myself for the worst.

Pregnancy symptoms hit like a hammer, then disappear and then reappear. Each day they feel stronger. My dreams have become incredibly vivid. From the moment I shut my eyes to win I awake I am having dreams that aren’t just visually vivid, but emotionally heart-wrenching. I wake up feeling like I’ve gone through the works emotionally, yet can never quite remember what I saw other than it hit the heart very hard.

My emotions go up and down like a roller coaster. My mood never stays in one place. I feel in a state of dread that things won’t work out, then I soar into optimism. There is no balance. I haven’t felt this vividly in a long time.

I feel hungry all the time. I went from being ice-cold a few days ago to feeling baking hot all the time even my hands are like ice. To change my weekly appointments at the clinic to the end of the week, I had to go extra early this week.

Unfortunately, this meant they could only check the HCG level. As I sat in the office I kept wondering if the result would be bad. I was here three and a half days ago and got an HCG of 65. Would the hammer of bad news crash down? Would I have to tell my husband the bad news?

Well, not this week.

HCG is 475!

So far, we’re doing wonderful.

Maybe next week be as blessed.

afterglow art backlit birds

Photo by luizclas on


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