About five years ago my husband and I began trying to start a family. It was the beginning of our journey through infertility. I always worried I might be infertile due to a childhood condition I had as a child (one that nearly killed me).
Before we married I warned him of the possibility, but he wanted to marry anyway. He wanted children, but he wanted me more. He could live without kids if that was what it came to. However, he didn’t feel he could live without me.
So we got married and after a year or more began trying in earnest. Nothing happened. Every month it would be a negative.
The first fertility clinic we went to had a female doctor. She could not give reasons and gave me some Chinese medicine to help. It didn’t.
Then my husband’s company transferred him and we put our family plans on pause. Our new area had a lot better options on fertility. The next clinic we went to had very good results for success. The lobby was always packed with women and the wait was two hours.
They had me pee in a cup to check if I was close to ovulating. They tried clomid with disastrous results. They also checked my AMH and discovered I was critically low and running out of time. I am likely to hit menopause before the age of 35.
I was devastated.
That clinic failed us so we switched to a different one where they also made me pee in a cup. The doctor had a sense of humor, something most lacked. Like the clinic before he was a guy. He had me monitor my body temperature every morning, but my basal body temperature never rises (I likely wasn’t ovulating much at this time).
It was there he performed an MRI and gave a devastating prognosis: adenomyosis
My uterus was heavily compromised by it. I likely also have endometriosis since the two tend to come together. I might never be able to become pregnant
I held it together the whole train ride home and, upon entering the doorway of my home, burst into tears in front of my husband who quickly hugged me and said it would be all right.
We went ahead and tried chemical IVF for the first time, but the cycle had to be cancelled. I failed to grow even three follicles from all those hormones. We still had to pay nearly $4000 for a completely failed round.
We decided one more time, but summer vacation was coming up. The doctor seemed more interested in his vacation (which I don’t hold against him since Japanese need to relax more) but something in the way he went about it irked me. This clinic had failed us for over six months.
It was time to move on. I called my husband he scheduled us an appointment at a clinic that specialized in natural IVF. I had never heard of this treatment before.
I walked in and they drew my blood. A follicle was almost mature and they asked if I’d like to extract the egg. I was floored. “Okay,” I said. The next day they took it out by needle, fertilized it, and then called us up to ask if we wanted to put the embryo back in.
Well, we did and two weeks later I was told by the doctor “You’re pregnant. Congratulations”.
I cried so hard and called my husband. For the next four and half a months were happy times. Our little one grew and grew. But some dreams don’t last. I still don’t feel up to sharing why we lost our son, but it had nothing to do with the IVF or my uterus.
Still, even though we lost our son, it taught us to hope. I held a baby to over 17 weeks in a uterus the doctor had said might never be able to hold an embryo at all. Sometimes I think of my son.
We haven’t given up. We are still using IVF to collect and freeze eggs since I’m running out and we thought stocking up for the future would be a good idea.
I now recommend natural IVF when I can. It worked much better for me and is far more affordable than chemical IVF in my opinion.
Here is a link on it for those that might be interested.